Man, I don't know about you, but listening to classic rock, funk, soul, rap, and r&b really lifts the spirits. It's also kind of sad, because you know that that era is long gone. I was listening to a Cd of classic r&b love songs, when something occurred to me: some of these lyrics sound like the verbal meanderings of a stalker! Seriously, if I was to put some of the lyrics in a letter, and send it to a lady, she'd probably turn it over to the cops!

One of my favorite songs, is Stevie Wonders' "All I Do", but when you listen to the lyrics, you get an image of a guy with one of those homemade shrines. You know the ones with the woman's picture surrounded by a gaggle of candles? Example:

"Gonna tell you girl

I'd light a candle every day
And pray that you'll always feel this way
And pray that our love will forever be new
I'm gonna tell you girl
If I cannot have you for my own
I'd rather be lonely and all alone"

It all seems innocent enough, until the letters and late night phone call start up! Still, it's one of my faves.

Let's take "Lady" by The Whispers, another classic, and great song as well. Towards the end when he does the ad libs? I start to become somewhat concerned for the object of his desire's safety, especially when Scottie does the skat part.

"I want you to hear every word I say yeah girl (Lady)

(Bweeble bwee bweeble bwee bwee)
That means I love you baby
(Bweeble bwee bweeble bwee bwee)
And that means that I want you baby
(Bweeble bwee bweeble bwee bwee)
And that means that I'm gon' get you baby
Well, well, well, well, don't you know that I love you girl
You kiss me and drive me crazy, yes you do girl
Kiss me, love me, squeeze me, love me
Do anything that you wanna do (Lady)
But don't you ever, ever, ever, ever go nowhere
Please I don't want you to go nowhere baby
Ya see I love you girl, can't you see that I'm saying that I need you, gotta have you..."

Be honest, if a person came up to you, and said that, you'd reach for the pepper spray, wouldn't you?

Don't get me wrong, I love these songs, but hey, sometimes you can't help but notice. Patti LaBelle's "Love and Need and Want You", has "300 yards at all times" written all over it. Then there's "It's All Over" by the Ohio Players. It's about a woman leaving a man, and he ain't having none of it!

"Put that suitcase down! You ain't leaving town!"

"Aw girl, put that suitcase down, you ain't kiddin' nobody. You can't leave me! You love me!"

Um sweetheart, I think you'd better drop them damn bags, and just try to get the hell out of the house alive! Sugarfoot is about to snap! Maybe you and the cops can go back for your stuff later. Who remembers the breakdown from "End Of The Road" by Boyz II Men? In it, dude says something like, "Baby when you was with that other man, I knew about it, but I didn't care. That's just how much I love you. Please, just come back.". Whenever I hear that, I can't help but think of the phrase, "And then he turned the gun on himself."

Even though I make fun of some of these songs, they're still among the best ever recorded and I'll put our generation's music up against anyone's, but sometimes thay make you wonder.

What next?

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