Rantings Of A Mad Rodent

Ah, cringe moments! You know those moments that you take to look at an old photo from high school or the club, and cringe at the sight of your bad perm or ridiculous outfit? Yeah, we've all been there, but at worst, it was only a source of laughter and not shame. Being in my 40's, an old Polariod picture from the 70's and 80's is about the only thing people my age have to worry about, unlike today's kids. Considering today's technology, young people would gladly trade with us!

The reason I'm writing this, is because after seeing a few young women posing for very graphic pictures, I began to wonder, "How is the going to go over when they get into their 30's and 40's?". I don't think that our young people TRULY realize that what's on the internet, STAYS on the internet. That threesome you allowed yourself to be filmed participating in and uploaded, ain't going nowhere, but that topless photo grandma took back in the 60's is probably long gone by now. I have a friend who took nude pictures for his girlfriend in high school in the 80's. He's at a Fortune 500 company now, because his prospective employee couldn't do a "search" for him on the internet. Conversely, we've all heard the story of the young man who didn't get the job, because someone in Human Resources found racy pictures that he'd upload to a page that he'd deleted YEARS earlier. Again, what's on the internet, STAYS on the internet!

It's cool to have fun and get "caught up" in the moment, as long as you don't get "caught up". I guarantee you, having someone see a picture of me from the 70's in bell bottoms, won't be nearly as bad as a prospective mate seeing a picture of you in college taking on 3 guys at once! You can burn a picture and trash a VHS tape, and know that it's destroyed. But when you hit that "delete" button, that doesn't mean that it's gone, it just means that YOU don't have it anymore. It's still there, and it WILL show up at the least opportune time. Guys, the next time you plop your privates out to take a picture for an "adult" forum, or you girls decide to "take it off" for the digital camera, realize that the young you will get a pass, but the old you will be paying for it. Think about it.

When you see Americans finishing last in worldwide polls that measure matters of common sense and intelligence, do you ever wonder how? I mean, we have some very brilliant people in this country, so how come we keep coming in last in these studies? I use to wonder that, but in the last 9 years, that little mystery kinda cleared itself up.

We have greedy ass old people wrecking town hall meetings trying to stop this "government run health care", even though they get Medicare and Medicaid. They're also saying that they don't want any socialist programs, even though they're receiving social security, a program that was modeled after a German socialist program. Why are they protesting against something that they already get themselve? Good question. We also have people against Obama's healthcare plan, just because they were told to. Nevermind the fact that most of these people are without health insurance. One ignorant ass lady said, "My deductable is $5000, and I don't want Obama messing that up." What?!! Obama even look directly into the camera and said, "If you like your current plan, you get to keep it.". What were the responses of the scared stupid Americans? "He's trying to take away my plan!". Can't you just smell the brilliance?

We had parents who were so mad that Obama's speech to school kids would be broadcast to students, that threatened to pull their kids out of school. You know, the usual "Eat your veggies and stay in school" line Presidents say to school kids? But now it seems that scared white people have been convinced that this speech is going to be a "brainwashing session". Even whole school districts were refusing to show it. Are you fucking kidding me?! You honest think that the President would get on camera and try to tell kids some shit that even you frightened ass racist parents don't understand? Don't you find it funny, that the parents who are concerned that their kids are going to be brainwashed, have been brainwashed themselves? "They've awakened a sleeping giant!", huh? Oddly enough, that "giant" was sleeping peacefully when the country was being run into the ground by the Bush administration.

Osama bin Laden and 11 other men from Saudi Arabia, with support from the Taliban in Afghanistan, attacked us on 9/11. We invaded Iraq. To this day, there are seemingly intelligent adults who still think that Sadam Hussain was behind the 9/11 attacks, even though there is concrete proof that he wasn't. Those who mentioned this fact, were called traitors and anti American by the stupid scared Americans. France saw through the rouse, and refused to participate. The stupid scared Americans responded by renaming french fries "freedom fries". We were so scared and stupid, that we willingly gave up our constitutional rights. Americans like to play the "founding fathers" card, when they want to justify doing something evil like the Patriot Act, but somehow, Ben Franklin's quote: "Those who would give up Essential Liberty to purchase a little Temporary Safety deserve neither Liberty nor Safety", doesn't seem to get mentioned. Wrong founding father I suppose. I guess they meant the one who said it was okay for them to wipe their collective asses with the Constitution.

Since "soccer moms" was already taken, Pres. Bush came up with "NASCAR dads", and now you have unemployed white men with no jobs or health insurance thinking they're Republicans! Then there was fight to put copies of the Ten Commandments in every government building. The proponents said that this country was built on the Ten Commandments, they just never mentioned that they broke every last one of them to build it! Americans specialize in short memories and stupidity.

And now we have the latest attraction in the main ring, the Tea Baggers and the Sarah Palin fanclub. Cue up the music and pass the cotton candy.

First of all, I hope everyone has a happy and prosperous 2010. Being that it is a new year, I've been thinking about making some changes. I'm sure you've seen every wannabe, hanger on, and Z list celebrity acknowledging me in their tweets, Facebook posts, and mixtapes. Yes, I am "hater". They seem to be obsessed with me, because they all give me shout outs, but I never acknowledge them. I was hoping that they'd have blown up, and become huge, thus making my "hating" productive, but sadly, such was not the case. I'm sure I'm not the only one that says to himself, "Who the hell are you?!", everytime someone says, "This goes out to all my haters!".

I've decided that I can't do the "hate" thing anymore. It's not personal, mind you. It's not you, it's me. Well, actually, it is you. You guys are no more famous than the guy that hands me my Chik Fil A chicken biscuit in the morning. You've only "made it" in your own minds, and I feel that I've wasted a whole year's worth of good, quality hate. It's not totally your fault, I'm partly to blame as well. I should've used my "hate" on people like Anthony David, India.Arie, or even Chris Bosh, but since they were already doing their thang, I decided to get in on the ground floor, and attach my "hate" to some unknowns. It seems like you benefited from this relationship more than I did. You got to shout me out every chance you got, and in return, all I got was, "Who?!", every time I mentioned you. So, I'm gonna move on. We could still be cool, and one day, hopefully you'll earn my "hate". Until then, could you please refrain from putting my name in your posts, tweets, and mixtapes until you've done something that won't make people say,"Who is this again?" ? Thank you, and buh bye.

You know, I'm always amused when I hear women say that they don't make men like their grandfathers and fathers anymore. They're quick to point out the decreased quality of today's men. So, you're telling me that over the last few decades, the overall quality of men have decreased, while the overall quality of women has increased? Riiiight. You can't possibly believe that. Do you know how your mothers and grandmothers got men like your fathers and grandfathers? Maybe your grandfather was a better breed of suitor, because he was courting a better breed of woman.

Think about it, women want a man to be the type of men that their grandfathers and fathers were, but they aren't willing to be the type of women that their grandmothers and mothers were. When my wife and I got together, we had nothing! All we had were our kids and each other. We built from the ground up. We had no car, dead end jobs, and my wife was working her way through college. I walked 2 1/2 miles to the nearest train station to catch the 5am train to get to work every morning. We used to have to take the bus to go grocery shopping, and we had to wear backpacks, so that we'd have somewhere to put the bags that we couldn't carry in our hands. We hung in there, and now our lives are significantly better. Again, she stayed while we built from the ground up! Find me atleast ONE woman that's willing to do that today? Don't worry, I'll wait. Most women today don't wanna build, they want what's been built! I told my 16 year old, that I felt sorry for him, and he asked why, and I said, "Because you'll NEVER find woman even half as good as your mother.".

When women learned the story of how President Obama courted Michelle, they started wondering if they were missing out on their Barack, and all I could do was laugh. I wanted to tell them that they weren't missing out on their Barack, because they weren't Michelles. Michelle stuck by a man with a law degree from Harvard, who chose to do community service. Today's women wouldn't have done that. They'd have gotten pissed that he wasn't pulling down figures at some law firm, nagged him endlessly, cheated on him, and ultimately left him. You know why? Because they don't make women like Michelle Obama or my wife anymore.

Now before you guys hit me with the "Not all women are like that!" emails, keep in mind that you women don't make those distinctions when talking about us men. I know all women aren't like that, I just wonder if you women know that all men aren't like that.

It doesn't matter what decade I write this in, it'll still be relevant. Now, more than ever, we've got white militia groups in the woods playing G.I. Joe with automatic weapons, and training. Training for what, you might ask. They're training to "take back their country", and in the process, kill blacks and Hispanics. What are the blacks and Hispanics doing? Why, they're killing each other! What the fuck sense does that make?! Then you have NorCal Hispanics killing SoCal Hispanics, black Bloods killing black Crips, northside blacks killing southside blacks, and so on. Talking about training for the bronze medal!

To be honest with with you, I don't even know why these ignorant baboons are even training. Hell, just sit back and let us finish killing each other, and when it's over, it'll just be black and Hispanic women and children left. The men will be dead, crippled, or in prison. It's amazing that we can stay so astoundingly stupid for so long! It seems like the only time we get impassioned about a cause, is what that cause calls for the destruction of each other. Blacks and Hispanics seem to be the only two groups of people willing to put themselves at a huge disadvantage in these critical times. We might as well put real bullets in the starter's pistol, and turn it on ourselves. Oh well, enjoy your bronze medals, you fucking losers!

My fellow Americans, I'm going to tell you something that you'll probably disagree with. We like to think that, since we put politicians in office, they work for us. THEY DON'T! Sorry, but they neither work for, nor represent us. I always hear people say, "They work for us! They should be doing our will.", wake up, Goldie Locks. Politicians work for big business and unions, plain and simple. Your vote is merely a ride to work for them. Basically, we're the bus drivers that take them to work. If you think I'm lying, think about this; if you email your congressman, you'll get a canned email response. If a lobbyist emailed your congressman, he'd get a return phone call....immediately! Is that anyway to treat your boss? Yes, your boss should get a phone call.

The last energy bill included input from the big oil and energy companies. How much of your input was included, boss? When we "employers" started losing our homes at record rates, who did they give the money to? When we "supervisors" objected to bailing out AIG, what happened? When we "bosses" found that we could go to Canada and get medicine for a whole lot cheaper than we could here, the big pharmaceutical companies didn't like that. What did our "employees", the lawmakers, do? They made it illegal. Now, they're trying to come to a consensus on this new health care bill, and who's pulling the strings? The insurance companies and the AMA. Where's your string to pull, Mr. Dithers? You can threaten to fire them, but in reality, your threats ring hollow. You know why? Because they know that they don't work for you!! Only we voters think that bullshit.

In theory, they're supposed to work for us. We send them to Washington to make things right for us, but somewhere along the line a coup was staged, and the unions and big corporations supplanted us as bosses. Yeah, they'll do the song and dance every election cycle, but instead of listening to the words of the song, pay attention to who the song is dedicated to. It ain't us! If you want to keep spouting that the politicians work for you, fine, have at it. Maybe it makes you feel good to say that, and that's fine too, but when you start to actually believe that, that's when the wheels start to come off. To be honest, the quicker you realize that politicians don't work for you, the better off you'll be come November 5th. That way, the vote you cast on the 4th won't hurt as bad. Now, if you'll excuse me, I need to turn to C-SPAN and check on my employees.

The people who "don't watch BET", can tell you the most about their shows.

The people who don't want their tax dollars to "pay for someone else's health care", had no problem with the corporate bailouts.

The people who criticized Al Sharpton and called him a "hater" for not being an early endorser of Obama, are now criticizing Obama.

There's been a shortage of funny white comedians lately. God, I miss Mitch Hedburg and Richard Jeni! Thank God, for Ron White!

The black people who "saw Bill Clinton's true colors" during the 2008 primary, quickly lost sight of them when he joined their fraternity.

The people who want to see a Jackson family tour and buy dvd's of Michael Jackson's rehearsal footage, are the same people that are saying, "Joe's trying to make money off of Michael!".

The women who said that Steve McNair deserved to be killed for cheating on his wife, are the same ones that said Rhianna should not have been harmed, regardless of what she did.

The people who said, "Obama is going to be the President of America, not Black America!", now want him to speak on reparations.

The businesses that are saying that their companies can't afford to pay its workers $7.25/hr, said that same thing about $6.55/hr.

If you talked about Farrah Fawcett's bad parenting, or Ronald Reagan's crooked deeds, it's disrespectful. Talk about Michael Jackson's legal troubles, it's "part of the story".